Marriage Vows

On occasion I think about our wedding vows. I think about how simple they are. So brief, concise and to the point. The vows we took were traditional. We didn’t decide to write our own vows, which had become a very trendy thing to do. We simply wanted to say our feelings out loud in front of our parents, family and friends, to declare out loud what we had discovered in our hearts and to make it real. To make our love something more than anything either one of us had felt before and to make our love tangible and durable, unique and precious beyond any other.

Your Dad, Papa, walked us through the ceremony. At the time I knew that was very special but now many years later, I have an even deeper appreciation for what that must have meant to him, to preside over the union of his only daughter to this “short man from New Jersey”. There were months when I wanted to capture our vows in writing.

I don’t know now looking back if we ever actually had them in writing since we didn’t write our own and since Papa lead us through the ceremony but, since they were the traditional, here they are again:

 I, Peter, take thee, Tess, to be my wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part.”

What a deep and meaningful work of art those simple words are as the days, weeks, months and years go on. The words never change but the true meaning and weight of them do daily. As the joke goes, I thought it was multiple choice… but it is not. These vows, within their simple phrases, carry the weight of the world. A weight one never knows until it is upon you. It’s to this and for this that I want to say Tess, I love you. You have stayed by my side for richer and for poorer. Days when even our smallest checks would bounce and where we would pawn our little TV to get through the weekend. Living in a little brick house with two kids, two dogs and no air conditioning. You loved me. We’ve had a couple of colds and the flu but suddenly here I am very weak and disabled. I can’t hike or bike or feel independent and strong, no I’m humbled with pain and can barely walk and yet you are here for me. We are no longer poor, no fear of bounced checks or pawning things to get through the weekend but it has not made a change in our lifestyle, our values or in what we both feel is important. You have a good heart. You are a good person, a good mother and a good friend. It is for all these things and everything we’ve shared that I still can say I love you. It has more meaning than even when we took our vows and it is more unique and more precious now than ever before.

Happy Birthday ❤️